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The DPP, not the one who tries cases for government, but the Democratic Progressive Party has taken the country’s political landscape by storm. Veteran politicians who were respected for serving Malawi’s version of the Grand Old Party (GOP)—the Malawi Congress Party—are now singing like canaries in praise of the DPP.
KSG patrons were surprised that some, like Republican Party president Gwanda Chakuamba, have even opted out of retirement vowing to eagerly serve the DPP. Chakuamba will be running day-to-day affairs of the DPP at a designation to be announced later and not as president as earlier strongly rumoured.
At first it all sounded like a concocted tale when respected leaders were talking of working closely with President Bingu wa Mutharika to help in the country’s development efforts, that is the way politics go in this country where one rarely associates this game with honesty.
Almost everyone at KSG was kept guessing about the intentions of this party that is about to be launched by Mutharika. For sure it has attracted many people from all walks of life who are promising to become loyal members the moment the registrar of political parties pronounces the DPP’s legal existence.
Many reasons have been advanced as to why people are rushing to the DPP and Judge Chimwamasana wanted to carefully sift through them with the help of other KSG patrons. The exercise was designed to find out why intelligent Malawians, even those certified to be of sober habits, are declaring total allegiance to a political movement that has no constitution and manifesto.
Most people understand information technology these days and have heard about couples dating blindly and eventually getting married on the Internet but this pales in comparison to the magnetic powers of DPP. That is why barman Wendewende pleaded with Chimwamasana to explain why respectable individuals who have been in the political arena since the days of the African National Congress were blindly getting hooked to a movement they do not know.
Chimwamasana started by pointing out that experience in the courts had taught him that every move that people make is necessitated by ‘possible gains’ sometimes called motives. He realised that the courts may soon begin to behave funny towards defendants who have recently joined the DPP.
The judge told the KSG clientele that they may witness strange acquittals of defendants who have joined DPP in cases that looked like straight convictions not so long ago. The government lawyers might inexplicably find themselves without evidence as the cases fizzle out one after another.
He noted that high on the list of possible gains that might be luring members to the DPP are money and immunity from court conviction.
“Soon we might shift from zero tolerance to corruption to five percent tolerance. When that happens then everyone here at KSG should know that our government has begun sliding backwards again in its proclaimed fight against graft,” said Chimwamasana. He looked around to find out if anyone was trying to offer him a round of his favourite Madeira and was shocked to learn that no one was particularly eager to do so.
They were all victims of zero tolerance and had no extra money to play with on them. Wendewende came to their rescue when he produce a 5-litre cask of Madeira and asked the judge to lead the toast to the dissolution of some established opposition political parties and their eventually being swallowed by the nonexistent DPP.
Most parties, which are too many to mention, are sending conflicting signals about their possible dissolution and amalgamation with the DPP dream. Surely, it only remains a dream so far.
The judge was not short of theatrics, He stood on a table and began drinking straight from the huge container given to him by dear Wendewende, saying: this is one of the possible gains in this world.
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