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by
Lance Ngulube, 10 December 2006
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06:19:19
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There shall be more comedians
God forbid. For the sake of ensuring sanity in Parliament the Malawi Electoral Commission (Mec) should act prudently and desist from quashing the Malawi School Certificate of Education as a minimum educational requirement for parliamentary aspirants.
If that paper is done away with, then there should be a better replacement. Otherwise, in future Presidential and Parliamentary elections I can foresee a long queue of comedians and cartoons (as raw stuff would put it) scrambling for seats and eventually snaking to the honourable House triumphantly.
The strength, ability and craftiness of fellows without an MSCE to gunner for support cannot be undermined. Given a level playing field to compete from, they can easily outnumber men and women of candid valour and intelligence by the sheer numbers they command from a predominantly poor and starving rural electorate or what are considered slum dwellers in cities and towns.
Generally in our societies there is always a higher degree of the feeling of camaraderie among the masses or the rubble rousing plebs, as writers of ancient Roman history and literature would love to put it, than those who have read volumes of books and other professional literature. They could wrest power from the academically enlightened persons and rule supreme.
If any political leader claims to have held a resounding and successful campaign rally anywhere, the attendees are always throngs of the poor masses. The ‘big big’ and very important persons in the society are usually fewer in number dotted at the so called high table facing poor souls in baking sunshine, whose vital votes are sought.
The men and women who organize and mobilize the masses to attend such rallies are a handful of helpers or loyalists, some of whom have never been through the doors of a school. These may be ‘illiterate’ but possess the required knowledge, skills and ingenuity to organize and convince the masses of the need to throw their weight behind a preferred candidate of their choice.
Imagine what would happen if the same people were now to turn round, denounce the attitudes and ‘deceitful’ mannerisms of the educated aspirants who only wear a human face during the campaign period and completely forget the masses once they are in office. They could upset tables and sway support in their favour – deservedly so in an open and free contest without safeguards of any kind.
By leaving the contest open ended without any form of minimum educational requirement we would do the country a lot of disservice. We would be allowing for total chaos and state of anarchy to prevail in the House when all you might have as members would be mere cheer leaders of the few fitting candidates that make it in a free for all battle.
Already, we have quite a number of legislators who just sit in the chamber for six weeks without uttering a word. All they excel in is the art of applauding what they perceive as popular motions even if they do not understand the argument and consequences.
We surely don’t want to relegate standards in the House to the era of one party rule when some found themselves in it by virtue of being nominated and went because there was no saying “no” to the Ngwazi’s dictates. Our forward march as a nation, should be reflected in the quality and standard of debates and analytical approach to issues under discussion in the chamber; mirroring the thinking of the intelligentsia of the country.
This is not time to have legislators who proudly assure the President that: “Mr. Speaker, Sir, we are ready for this inflation. Whether it infiltrates our borders from Mozambique or Tanzania and attacks us, we shall fight it even with our bare hands. It must not attempt to cross the border and the Ngwazi should not worry but sleep soundly at Zomba State House.”
We should also not re-live the early Kenyan scenario where a legislator moaned the plight of starving restitutes on the streets;
“Me Speaker, Sir,” he implored the House in Swahili, “Everywhere I go in the City of Nairobi, I see too many shops with the name SALE, SALE, SALE written on walls, windows and banners. Why should we have children starving and dying in the streets when rich people such as MR. SALE can donate a little something to help these poor fellows? Or does MR. SALE want to force us to deport him to his country of origin for ignoring the poor?”
The House burst out in laughter. The MP felt good that he had delivered a strong statement and earned himself the nickname Mr. Sale. We definitely have gone beyond this stage today and should not go back.
Unless one can convince me that people elected to Parliament can ably speak Chichewa, the issue of adopting a local language as a medium of communication would be prickly one. Just which one would fit all sizes in the House?
We Malawians are a proud lot. We take singular honour in identifying with our various places of origin. Accept or deny it, the introduction of district based vehicle registration numbers has not been a nationally unifying factor as some officials in the Road Traffic Department would want us to believe. Whew! How do you achieve national unity when you tell people to ‘go out in public and shout your district of origin through your number plate?’
Just recently I had parked a borrowed vehicle at an isolated spot outside town. A passer by stopped to chat with me. I admired his cordial and warm disposition towards me, which is rare these days with incidents of armed robbery and carjacks occurring frequently.
When he was departing he finally posed the million dollar question: “By the way, which part of Nkhotokota district do you come from? I see your car bears my home district’s registration number. We are one.”
My earlier puzzle over his prompt friendliness was now solved. I understood where our chemistry had fused – the KK registration on the vehicle I drove this day. My mind wandered, how can parliamentary debates be conducted in a local language given this mentality?
I am not sure we can compare ourselves to the practice at the United Nations, European and African unions’ fora. There you have members from different countries and ethnic backgrounds who are fluent in their local dialects. Simultaneous translations into other widely spoken languages are necessary. Among those members or delegates there are no inter-tribal conflicts or differences that would most probably characterise our legislative chamber.
—Feedback: nation@nationmalawi.com
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